Tip: don’t eat while reading this. Besides public toilets, people used chamber pots inside their homes, usually stored under beds. It’s a disgusting but true fact that these chamber pots were not uncommonly dumped out windows onto walkways.
At night, the smelly excrement stayed under the bed. In the morning, watch out! From upper stories, passersby walking beneath had to be careful. Toilet paper was not invented yet, so, moss, leaves, grass or straw might do the trick. In fact, toilet paper would only be invented in 1857, and consumers would have to wait til 1890 for it to be commercially available.
Medieval Castle Garderobes Weren’t Used for Clothing
In Medieval castles, protruding masonry walls called garderobes were actually bathrooms because they are similar in size and shape to wardrobes. The room protruded from the castle walls so that the deposits one made upon relieving themselves in the garderobe could fall through a hole into the moat. Depending on the castle's occupancy size, moats may have developed quite a stench.
Public sewer systems were not a thing in the Middle Ages. They were completely absent. When the Roman Empire fell, so did aqueducts, sewage systems, and basic sanitation. In fact, it took centuries for Medieval cities and towns to transition to working urban sanitation systems, and that did not happen until the Enlightenment.
A Peek Inside a Garderobe
Let's take a closer look at the Garderobe latrine, a fascinating historical feature. This peculiar toilet design is quite intriguing. Instead of flushing, a hole is present, leading directly to the surrounding moat. Surprisingly, the accumulated excrement played a vital role in deterring enemy infiltrations, an often overlooked aspect of a moat's military defense strategy.
Interestingly, monasteries had similar-looking toilets, although the number of potty holes would usually not exceed 45. On the other hand, commoners shared public latrines, just like the monks, without any privacy whatsoever. These public facilities were regularly emptied into a cesspit, occasionally repurposed as fertilizer for agricultural needs.
Medievalists Had A Cure for Baldness
Good news, right? Here’s the cure: “Take bear fat [i.e. kill a bear without a pistol], a small number of ashes from wheat straw or from winter wheat straw, mix this together and anoint the entire head with it.” This is according to the 12th-century scholar Hildegard. Another treatment included mixing chicken or pigeon droppings with ashes and lye and rubbing it on the bald spot.
In the Middle Ages, though vanity, as today, preferred a nice head of hair, a wide bald spot did represent virility, as long as the man grew a thick beard. A man without a dense beard, but chocked with abundance on top, was considered weak.
Bloodletting: The Cure-All
Be thankful that modern doctors won’t try to cure your illness by attaching blood-sucking leeches to your flesh. Besides applying leeches or worms to draw blood from the patient, opening a vein directly with an incision to alleviate excess blood in the body was also practiced in the Medieval period.
If these methods failed, physicians might try charms, totems, or amulets, which make sense when you know that the Christian church believed sin was responsible for diseases. Still, 'sense' is a stretch. This practice lasted centuries after the Middle Ages, and it was even the cause of death for President George Washington.