She has a crown, a scepter, and a heavy, bejeweled back piece. She is ready for the carnival. Everyone has been waiting all year for Rio de Janeiro’s prime time, where anything goes and all are welcome. If you do have a golden snake adorning your head and making you look completely out of proportion.
She is ready to hit the streets and samba all night long. Oh, wait, wedding. That’s what she’s ready for. We can only hope that this outfit is not as heavy as it looks so she can dance, if not samba, then at least an Austrian waltz.
Now You See Me; Now You Don't
At first, we thought this was the Eurovision Song Contest somewhere in the late 1970s, and Spain was about to perform with a lead singer and a bunch of cute kids. Then we realized it was summer 2013, Jean-Paul Gaultier was presenting his new collection, and the kids....well, we have no idea what they were doing there.
Is this supposed to be some kind of pick-about game? Who are these children hiding from? Doesn't the model know they are under her dress? We have so many questions and so few answers to share. God help us, and God help that dress.
It Must Be…Magic!
So this bride seems to be, um...levitating because there’s no way that she can easily walk down the runway with her knees bound so tightly together! We’re not sure which designer thought this dress was a good idea, but it kind of looks like there’s another person hiding underneath that dress. If you’ve ever seen Muppets From Space or Austin Powers in Goldmember, you’ll immediately wonder if there’s a dwarf under there somewhere.
But hey, the top half looks rather elegant. Points for trying? Maybe she should have had her photo taken from the waist up, letting the viewers only imagine what the bottom part looked like.
Bridging Bride
This couple wasn't willing to bypass the traditional bride and groom wedding photo taken in Central Park. They had been dreaming of this moment for their entire life, and nothing was going to ruin it for them. The sun was shining, and it was a perfect day.
They had the dress (and what a dress it was), the groom was there, and they even got a jogger to join in. That's one thing about the Central Park photo. You never know who will surprisingly appear on your best shot, so taking birds, squirrels, old people on benches, and, of course, joggers is a must.
Drop Dead Gorgeous!
Okay, so despite the gloomy weather, gothic handmaiden, and, um... skeleton makeup, this is actually quite a pretty gown! Holding a single red rose, this bride’s look is pretty much poetry. Swathed in ivory silk with a train almost floating behind her, we’re actually really digging this.
Gliding around the streets, this solemn figure is the ghost bride of any goth guy’s dreams! No doubt, her groom will make for a rather dapper man of the undead. Does this, then, mean it’s unholy matrimony? Now seriously. We understand this is art, and art has no boundaries but isn't art in our time of age should at least be able to breathe?